to dig deeper. When I drill into new biblical territory, I start by studying the main word in the original Greek. “Joyful” is translated from chairete. The Greek root is often translated “to rejoice, be glad.”
When I’m thankful and I turn my eyes toward Christ to ponder his love and goodness, my soul and my perspective shift to give me a revelation of something bigger than myself. Ellen Vaughn, in her book Radical Gratitude, expresses this so well: “It’s incredible: The small, compliant human action of saying ‘thank you’ constantly links us to the awesome Creator of the universe. In the practice of perceiving every part of every day as a gift from Him, we stay connected to Christ … as we thank God for His presents, we remain in His presence.”2
This new insight was like a clearer pair of glasses, opening my eyes and heart to a hidden secret. My joy would return if I gave thanks. That’s all I wanted: simple joy.
With all my heart I believed God’s Word to be true, and I cracked the first pages of my new “thankful journal.” To keep the concept simple and uncluttered, I numbered my entries and kept them to one line each. In the days after Jack’s collapse in the kitchen, during his time in ICU, and in the ensuing dark days around the funeral, I was determined to stay thankful. Here are some of my numbered entries from my thankful journal:
2909. In the midst of ripping pain, I feel peace
2910. Michelle dropped everything and flew in from Florida
2911. Janice and Brendon were here in hours
2915. People who bring coffee or tea
2918. The way my children love me
2919. Reading Jack’s prayer journal
2920. People who bring food
2923. Alex hugging me
2924. Laughter in the midst of tears
2929. Tim, who took over all the family responsibilities for the last two weeks
2930. Our matching plaid shirts
2934. Everyone went back home safely
2936. Going on a walk with the boys
2938. Reading hundreds of cards
2942. Making it through my first church service
2946. People who really care
On May 6, 2019, I reached journal entry number 5,000. Looking back and reflecting over these words since Jack’s death, I was amazed that God’s command to be thankful is true: it restored my joy.
Please don’t think for a moment that this came easily. For thanksgiving and joy to become a reality, I had to fight against my heart’s inclination to linger in pain, worry, and feeling lost or alone. It took deliberate choices to stop and number my thankfulness. In fact, it was so hard that three months after Jack’s death I crashed into a pit of darkness and was diagnosed with PTSD. There were days when all I could write was “I got out of bed today” or “today I put on some makeup and bought groceries.” I concur with David in the psalms: “Hour by hour I place my days in your hand” (Ps. 31:15 MSG). If we want joy, we must fight for it using a powerful tool available to all of us: the superpower of thankfulness.
Thankfulness is a cultivated discipline that comes from the realization that God’s boundless grace does not entitle one to his blessing and joy, and it doesn’t mean I deserve it. But, as God’s adopted daughter and a recipient of God’s heavenly blessings, I need to turn to him and say thank you.
Take Care of Your Heart
To experience deep joy in any circumstance, we must prepare—by learning and cultivating—our soul for storms. Suffering and storms are normal, so, when these difficult times come, we must be ready. We can’t run a successful triathlon or climb Mount Everest unless we train; we won’t have a vibrant marriage unless we learn humility, forgiveness, and grace; and we won’t have a retirement fund unless we save and invest. When an unexpected storm blows in, how can we tap into deep joy if we haven’t invested in deep soul care? Let’s explore this further with a story wherein paying attention to details could have averted a huge disaster.
It was a harrowing experience for 1,373 passengers and crew members of the Viking Sky, a luxury cruise ship from the Norwegian company Viking Cruise, when it encountered a violent storm. Normally that is not a problem for large cruise ships. But in this case, with waves up to eight metres high smacking the ship, the engines were disabled when they ran out of lubricating oil to keep the engines running. After suffering a power blackout, the Viking Sky sent out a mayday call. The Associated Press reported that “passengers [recalled] a large wave crashing through glass doors and knocking people across the floor of an area where they were instructed to gather as a muster point.” The waves were too high to evacuate the ship by rescue boats, so five helicopters evacuated 479 passengers, winching up passengers one by one as winds howled in the dark night. After the storm, the ship travelled to a Norwegian port under its own power.3
This is a victorious end to a disaster story, but I can’t imagine being a passenger on a gorgeous luxury cruise liner tossed around in heavy seas due to engine failure caused by a lack of oil. Wow, all this unnecessary angst and extra cost because someone forgot to check the oil levels. Paying attention to details could have averted a huge disaster.
To prepare for ensuing storms—and they will come—we must have a settled assurance that God is on our side, he is a good God, and he wants us to live out our very best life. We must learn to trust his word: “If God is for us, who can be against us?” (Rom. 8:31). In her book Choose Joy, Kay Warren simply states,
When your heart does not see the goodness of God, you’re not going to say thank you to him. You’re not going to experience joy because you’re putting your energy into what you don’t have, what you don’t like about your life, what you wish was different. You ignore all that God has already done and will continue to do in your life.4
The Norwegian luxury ship encountered an avoidable disaster because the crew workers in charge of the engine were unprepared. Inattentiveness leaves us wide open to unnecessary pain.
After my first husband, Dick, died, my friend Darlene and I had a raw conversation about how we learn to cope when disaster strikes. She openly admitted, “Heidi, if something like that ever happens to me, I hope I have the deep faith that you do.” Not long after this conversation, her daughter died suddenly while asleep. My friend had not taken the time to nurture her heart and build her faith. She was left bereft, floating aimlessly and helplessly. Too often people tell me, “I really want to read my Bible and learn to pray, but I just don’t have the time.” My question to you is, When will you have the time? Will you have time after the disaster strikes? To find abiding joy during any circumstance or storm, we must learn to prepare.
Throughout the Bible, the metaphor of oil represents the work of the Holy Spirit and God’s power. To get ready for our storms, we must soak ourselves in this oil, and it starts by taking care of the most important aspect of our being—our heart. The Bible tells us, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it” (Prov. 4:23). Here are six ways to get started:
• Invite the Holy Spirit to inhabit every part of your spirit to help you discern God’s truth versus Satan’s insidious lies.
• Read the Bible and memorize key verses to be your anchors and reminders of God’s goodness when your world falls apart.
• Learn to trust God by communicating with him through prayer.
• Joy is like a muscle we need to exercise. Learn to cultivate a thankful heart. Gratitude produces more emotional energy than any other attitude. Grateful people are the happiest and most content people I know.
• Join a Bible study group and connect to like-minded people who are also on a quest to find spiritual strength and power.
• Study the work of the oil of the Holy Spirit.
Then stand amazed at the unexplainable work of the Holy Spirit, who lives within you to give you power to overcome the difficult