Arthur Sullivan

The Complete Plays of Gilbert and Sullivan


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CAPT. and SIR JOSEPH. For her union with his lordship.

       ALL. Rend with songs the air above

       For the man who owns her love!

       [Exit JOS.

       CAPT. Sir Joseph, I cannot express to you my delight at the

       happy

       result of your eloquence. Your argument was unanswerable.

       SIR JOSEPH. Captain Corcoran, it is one of the happiest

       characteristics

       of this glorious country that official utterances are invariably

       regarded

       as unanswerable. [Exit SIR

       JOSEPH.

       CAPT. At last my fond hopes are to be crowned. My only daughter

       is to

       be the bride of a Cabinet Minister. The prospect is Elysian.

       (During this

       speech DICK DEADEYE has entered.)

       DICK. Captain.

       CAPT. Deadeye! You here? Don't! (Recoiling from him.)

       DICK. Ah, don't shrink from me, Captain. I'm unpleasant to look

       at, and

       my name's agin me, but I ain't as bad as I seem.

       CAPT. What would you with me?

       DICK (mysteriously). I'm come to give you warning.

       CAPT. Indeed! do you propose to leave the Navy then?

       DICK. No, no, you misunderstand me; listen!

       DUET

       CAPTAIN and DICK DEADEYE

       DICK. Kind Captain, I've important information,

       Sing hey, the kind commander that you are,

       About a certain intimate relation,

       Sing hey, the merry maiden and the tar.

       BOTH. The merry maiden and the tar.

       CAPT. Good fellow, in conundrums you are speaking,

       Sing hey, the mystic sailor that you are;

       The answer to them vainly I am seeking;

       Sing hey, the merry maiden and the tar.

       BOTH The merry maiden and the tar.

       DICK. Kind Captain, your young lady is a-sighing,

       Sing hey, the simple captain that you are,

       This very might with Rackstraw to be flying;

       Sing hey, the merry maiden and the tar.

       BOTH. The merry maiden and the tar.

       CAPT. Good fellow, you have given timely warning,

       Sing hey, the thoughtful sailor that you are,

       I'll talk to Master Rackstraw in the morning:

       Sing hey, the cat-o'-nine-tails and the tar.

       (Producing a

       "cat".)

       BOTH. The merry cat-o'-nine-tails and the tar!

       CAPT. Dick Deadeye—I thank you for your warning—I will at

       once take

       means to arrest their flight. This boat cloak will afford me

       ample

       disguise—So! (Envelops himself in a mysterious cloak, holding it

       before

       his face.)

       DICK. Ha, ha! They are foiled—foiled—foiled!

       Enter Crew on tiptoe, with RALPH and BOATSWAIN meeting

       JOSEPHINE, who

       enters from cabin on tiptoe, with bundle of necessaries, and

       accompanied by LITTLE BUTTERCUP.

       ENSEMBLE

       Carefully on tiptoe stealing,

       Breathing gently as we may,

       Every step with caution feeling,

       We will softly steal away.

       (CAPTAIN stamps)—Chord.

       ALL (much alarmed). Goodness me—

       Why, what was that?

       DICK. Silent be,

       It was the cat!

       ALL. (reassured). It was—it was the cat!

       CAPT. (producing cat-o'-nine-tails). They're right, it was the

       cat!

       ALL. Pull ashore, in fashion steady,

       Hymen will defray the fare,

       For a clergyman is ready

       To unite the happy pair!

       (Stamp as before, and Chord.)

       ALL. Goodness me,

       Why, what was that?

       DICK. Silent be,

       Again the cat!

       ALL. It was again that cat!

       CAPT. (aside). They're right, it was the cat!

       CAPT. (throwing off cloak). Hold! (All start.)

       Pretty daughter of mine,

       I insist upon knowing

       Where you may be going

       With these sons of the brine,

       For my excellent crew,

       Though foes they could thump any,

       Are scarcely fit company,

       My daughter, for you.

       CREW. Now, hark at that, do!

       Though foes we could thump any,

       We are scarcely fit company

       For a lady like you!

       RALPH. Proud officer, that haughty lip uncurl!

       Vain man, suppress that supercilious sneer,

       For I have dared to love your matchless girl,

       A fact well known to all my messmates here!

       CAPT. Oh, horror!

       RALPH and Jos. { I } humble, poor, and lowly born,

       He

       The meanest in the port division—

       The butt of epauletted scorn—

       The mark of quarter-deck derision—

       Have } dare to raise { my } wormy eyes

       Has his

       Above the dust to which you'd mould { me

       him

       In manhood's glorious pride to rise,

       I am } an Englishman—behold { me

       He is him

       ALL. He is an Englishman!

       BOAT. He is an Englishman!

       For he himself has said it,

       And it's greatly to his credit,

       That he is an Englishman!

       ALL. That he is an Englishman!

       BOAT. For he might have been a Roosian,

       A French, or Turk, or Proosian,

       Or perhaps Itali-an!

       ALL. Or perhaps Itali-an!

       BOAT. But in spite of all temptations

       To belong to other nations,

       He remains an Englishman!

       ALL.