is comfortable making your way through unmarked wilderness or finding a new shortcut, don’t expect your partner to share your enthusiasm for cross-country exploration right away. For at least the first few trips you do together, stick to marked trails or simple canoe or kayak routes so your partner can see that you are staying on the right track. Sometimes all it takes to put someone’s mind at ease is the reassurance of seeing a blaze or a signpost. Show your partner on the map exactly where you are, and do it more often than you think you should—every five or 10 minutes is a good idea if your partner is worried about it.
If you’re extremely nervous about getting lost, even on a marked trail, plan your first trip along a heavily used route. Running into other people on a regular basis will be reassuring and keep you or your partner from thinking that you could be stranded alone in the woods. You’ll have to sacrifice some of the privacy you’d find on less popular trails, but until you’re comfortable, you aren’t likely to enjoy the privacy much anyway. Campers are a friendly bunch, so if you run into people coming from the opposite way, you can ask them about the terrain up ahead, and how far you are from your destination.
Maps are important on any camping trip. Before the trip, spread out the map on a table and look over your route and where you’ll be stopping each night if you aren’t returning to a base camp. Pay attention to landmarks like rivers, lakes, and bridges that will be recognizable as you pass them on your trip. If you get familiar with the route before you’re on it, you won’t feel as powerless and dependent on your more experienced partner.
Personally, I like to use this kind of landmark technique to keep me motivated on a long walk. I’ll check out the map for points that will be easy to recognize, like a footbridge we have to cross. Then when we get there, I know exactly how far along the route we’ve gone, and how much is left to go. It’s also a good way to know if I’ve somehow taken the wrong trail. If I’m supposed to cross a bridge after 1 mile, and two hours later I still haven’t crossed it, it’s time to think about where I might have made a wrong turn. Bodies of water are the easiest to spot, along with buildings (like huts, for instance), cliffs, and ridges. Remember that a small stream marked on a map may not be there during a dry spell, or a new stream that’s not marked on the map may appear after a storm. Never rely on just one landmark, but on the various ones you pass along the whole route.
Better still, learn how to use a compass and map to find your own way. Navigating and orienteering skills are very empowering and build confidence. If you’ve got the time before you head out, take a navigation course. Even if your partner is willing to help you, sometimes a proper teacher makes a big difference in picking up new knowledge. Knowledge is power, and power will give you the confidence to face the wilderness. If you want to take things a step further, it is now quite feasible to carry your very own GPS (global-positioning system) receiver on your camping trips. They are small, lightweight, and can tell you precisely where you are.
Another thing to do before you leave is tell someone where you are going and when you expect to be back. If there is someone back in civilization waiting to call out the troops if you don’t show up when you’re supposed to, it will add an extra level of assurance.
Cold
If you’ve never slept outside, you’re probably expecting to get cold on your camping trip. After all, we live in houses for a good reason. My boyfriend, Gerhard, is always cold. He’ll wear two fleece jackets inside the house. So it may seem kind of surprising that he likes going camping, even when it’s not summer. Giving up the comfort of a warm bed is something that makes a lot of people shy away from camping. But as Gerhard knows, there’s just no reason to be cold on a camping trip if you take the right stuff with you.
With proper clothing, a good sleeping bag, and a tent, you’ll be in for a cozy night in almost any conditions. (Of course, if you’re new to camping, you may want to avoid doing your first trip in the middle of winter, just to be safe.) If you know that you get cold easily, remember to pack extra layers. Dry socks, warm gloves, and a wool or fleece hat can turn a chilly night into a perfect opportunity to cuddle. And don’t hold back on the cuddling! It will not only keep you both warm, but also distract you from the fact that it’s cold outside.
It’s in the Bag
“ My only memory of camping out as a kid was shivering all night in my sleeping bag and wishing I was home. So when I spent the first night in the down sleeping bag I borrowed from my friend, I was wearing about ten layers of clothing. It took about five minutes for me to start sweating buckets and stripping off layers of fleece. My girlfriend thought I was a complete nutcase. I guess I must have looked like one. I wonder what my childhood sleeping bag was made of—old bed sheets, maybe? ”
—RS
If you share your sleeping bags, you can benefit from the extra warmth of your partner’s body heat. There are a number of double-size sleeping bags available. But most brands’ single bags can be zipped together into a double as well, if you buy one left-opening and one right-opening bag. You can even combine different models and/or brands into one “interspecies” bag if the zippers are the same size and the bags are roughly the same shape and length. Whatever brand you go with, check at the store to make sure that the bags will “mate.” And then be prepared for a little mating of your own! A double bag makes it much easier to get intimate without getting cold at the same time. So if you’re hoping to have a romantic night even though the temperature has dropped, the double bag is ideal. Before you know it, you’ll both be complaining about how hot it is in there.
In areas that allow it, a campfire can be a romantic way to stay warm after sundown without having to hide inside your tent right away. Sitting beside a crackling fire is one of my favorite things about camping, especially if I get to snuggle with my man. It’s like a candlelight dinner a hundred times over. The smell of the wood smoke permeates my camping clothes and acts as a reminder of the romantic night by the fire for the rest of the trip. As an added bonus, the smoke helps to keep bugs away. It’s not always possible or practical to light a fire, but if the campsite has a fire pit and there’s no ban in place, it’s a great way to spend the evening together. Just don’t go cutting down trees to get fuel.
If you’re afraid that camping will entail spending the night shivering away, pack a few marshmallows and look forward to sitting by a cozy fire toasting them together. Then snuggle into your warm sleeping bags and make a real effort to heat things up in your tent.
Great Balls of Fire!
“ When I met my future husband, I made it very clear that I was not an “outdoorsy” kind of person. I like to be warm, dry, and comfortable, thank you very much. But as things got more and more serious between us, he started trying to subtly suggest that if I gave it a try, I might just enjoy myself. It took an awful lot of convincing, but by the time we got married, I was willing to give it a shot.
On our very first camping trip together, it rained all day. My husband tried to console me by making a nice campfire, but, of course, the wood was all wet and he couldn’t get it to light. He was so determined to show me he could light a fire that he poured lighter fluid all over the thing, and when he threw in the match, it went up like a big fireball and nearly burned his eyebrows off! And then it went out again anyway.
Lucky for him, the sun came out the next day, and the rest of our trip was really nice. Otherwise, that might have been the end of camping for me. But now I actually have learned to love the outdoors, and while I still prefer to sleep in my bed, I can give it up now and then. ”
-–TS
Rain
It’s a fact of life that if you go camping, you will eventually encounter some rainy weather. You might as well be ready for it. Try out your rain gear on a stormy day at home to make sure that it does keep the water out. Knowing that you have the right gear will help you to relax on your trip.
A little rain might not be so bad if you have ways to pass the time. Pack a deck of cards and a couple of magazines, and bring an extra tarp and ropes for some shelter outside of the tent. Of course, a rainy night (or day) is a perfect excuse to hide in your tent for a little extra snuggling and sex. Might as well stay warm!
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