Ph.D. Ph.D. Anonymous

Conscious Contact


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travelers. We must be aware of our inner guidance and turn to it when our intuition beckons. We must explore our new life with intent. For this is being vigilant. It pushes us to do our recovery work when inattention and negligence might otherwise hinder our growth. Vigilance is the driving force behind our exploration in recovery, so that every day we may know recovery for the first time.

      My recovery is not a destination.

      It is a vigilant journey.

      I'm new at it, but I think this is the most exciting adventure I've ever been on.

      ∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 369

      February 5

      It ain't what they call you; it's what you answer to. ~W.C. Fields

      We all know about the SASTOs (Some Are Sicker Than Others) and the SAWTOs (Some Are Weller Than Others) in the Program. The problem is that we aren’t smart enough to predict which is which. It’s been said, “Never bet on a drunk either way: to achieve sobriety or fail to grasp it.” Seeing a newcomer, we might smirk, “Oh, she’s just here to flirt with the guys. She’ll never make it.” Thirty years later, however, that same woman may be leading a spiritual retreat that we are attending. Perhaps, because we are in such awe of how “spiritual” a man seems, we put him on a pedestal next to Bob S., Bill W., or Ron R. only to be 12-stepping him next month. Our job is not to predict who are the SASTOs or the SAWTOs. Our job is to be here whenever anyone, anywhere reaches out for help.

      Anyone in the Program may call me a SASTO,

      just as long as I answer as a SAWTO.

      Who would ever have believed that anyone as sick as I was, at that time, would become part of something so beautiful, an organization that has helped so many people?

      ∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 337

      February 6

      Freedom from fear comes through love; may the beloved’s blessing reign with all hearts! ∼Nan C. Merrill

      Most of us arrive at the doors of Chemically Dependent Anonymous full of fear and anxiety. We felt like we were in the darkroom where negatives were developed. How wonderful it is to be given the tools of recovery that enable us to stand in the sunlight of the Spirit, face our fears, and turn them into something positive. The love we discover in the Fellowship and from our Higher Power is the key to facing our fears. Yet, we don’t go automatically from “full of fear” to “full of love.” It is a process through which we allow others to be filled with love. We practice the principles of the Program, and feel love. We do service for our home group, and we feel greater love. We work with others, and the love overflows. Who of us can live in fear when our lives are overflowing with love?

      When I am full of love, there is

      no room for fear to develop.

      I have everything I need, now, and almost everything I want. I have peace of mind. I have love. I care about all of you.

      ∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 296

      February 7

      Stop judging others and you will not be judged. For others will treat you as you treat them.

      ~Matthew 7:1-2

      We cannot afford the luxury of resentments, this we know. But one of the things that we fail to recognize is that resentments are created because we judge someone or something to be wrong. Without judging another to be wrong, we would not have resentments! We are told in Chemically Dependent Anonymous to stay focused on our side of the street, and avoid attempts at correcting and judging the wrongs of others. After all, are we such great students of human relations that we can honestly assess situations that are causing us emotional upset? When we judge and resent, then sadly, we will treat the ones we resent accordingly—and it isn’t with loving kindness! If we don’t want to be judged or resented by others, and then treated badly, we need to not do it ourselves. We need to remember that breaking the cycle starts with us.

      I change the way I treat others before

      I question the way God treats me.

      In {using a Fourth Step resentment list}, we have the opportunity to let go of blame, to examine our own emotions and attitudes, and to take responsibility for our part.

      ∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 55

      February 8

      Almost always, if I measure my decision carefully by the yardsticks of absolute honesty, absolute unselfishness, absolute purity, and absolute love, and it checks up pretty well with those four, then my answer can't be very far out of the way. ∼Dr. Bob

      The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions were founded on the Four Absolutes. These Absolutes are the principles taught in the Oxford Movement, an early Christian group attended by the founders of A.A. A good spiritual exercise is to meditate on them and consider how they add to our decisions:

      1.Absolute Honesty: Both with ourselves and with others, in word, deed, and thought;

      2.Absolute Unselfishness: To be willing wherever possible to help others in need;

      3.Absolute Love: To love God with our whole heart, mind, and soul, and to love our neighbors as ourselves; and,

      4.Absolute Purity: Integrity and clarity of mind, of body, and of purpose.

      I memorize the four absolutes and measure

      my decisions against their wisdom.

      So we obey the spiritual principles of our program in both our personal and our group lives {…}

      ∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 97

      February 9

      There is nothing we can’t handle together, you, me and God. ∼Margo T.

      One striking thing about the Twelve Steps is that they begin with the word “we.” It’s neither “you,” nor “I,” not even “they.” It is we, for we do this program together. How wonderful a feeling it is to know that we are not alone any longer. What a beautiful concept to be in a fellowship where we work together as equals. We are not preached to by someone pointing a finger and saying, “You have to do thus and such.” Nor are we left to our own devices by having to determine for ourselves, “I must do thus and such.” The joy of the Fellowship is that we work together, hand in hand with one another and with a Higher Power of our own understanding. Let us always remember, there is nothing that you, I, and God cannot handle with the power of we.

      I alone can do it, but I can’t do it alone.

      We’ve been there, we know the pain and suffering caused by this disease.

      ∼Chemically Dependent Anonymous P 111

      February 10

      Some days you’re the windshield, some days you’re the bug. ∼Mary Chapin Carpenter

      Having the option to make different choices, when meeting the situations in our daily lives, is what makes recovery interesting. Some days we are on top of everything that rears its ugly head, feeling cheered on by our Higher Power. Other days, we are under the covers unable to peek into the light of day. Some days we are the shining ones who inspire others and. at times, it is others who must drag us out of our misery and to a meeting. No matter what the situation though, if we face it honestly, incorporating what we have learned from our home group, from literature, and from our sponsor, we can progress to a greater understanding of ourselves and others. From this, we can appreciate that we are neither the windshield nor the bug, but the guy with the squeegee.

      Being my best self enables me to clean the bugs